Frustration City

Yes, I had to give up on the Dax Moy challenge - it was too restrictive for me and it ended up being something I decided I did not want to do at this point. I think it was a good program, but for someone more advanced who wants to take it to the next level.

Does this mean I have given up on my goals? No. I still eat clean (95% of the time) and I am following an 8k training program. This has me running 4 days a week and cross training at least 2. I tryto add some ab work or weights in to at least one of the running days as well. I really need to develop muscle tone.

Last night I was so proud of myself for working out when I got home late from work, did not feel like working out, and still had to cook dinner afterwards. I went for my run anyway, did some pilates and stretching when I got home, showered, cooked dinner, and ate a lot later than usual. And I was ok with that. It happens, and Ican't let life or my mood get in the way of my goals.

Today, however, has been particualrly frustrating. It all started when I weighed myself and discovered that I have not lost any weight. It appears the initial change in numbers was a fluke. I am eating clean, watching portions, drinking tons of water and completing my workouts. I even cut out caffeine and most sugar! Not drinking coke or eating chocolate - hardest thing ever. Yet, the number on the scale doesn't change. I feel better, but I really really want to be thinner. I want to wear my cute clothes again or get new cute clothes. I hate trying to hide my size. I won't go into detail of the other frustrations of the day, but they are plenty.

I really just want to go home and snuggle on the couch with my kitties. But instead I am here. dealing with it. Just doing it.

Day 7

I began 8k training last night. We have 4 scheduled runs a week, plus cross-training and a walk on Sunday. Trying not to think about how to fit everything in, but I know that I have to plan everything out. If I don't keep it all organized, I get off track. So yes, I meal plan and I prepare food in advance so it's there. That helps me stay away from the pizza and pasta.

Progress: I feel stronger. Last night when I went to bed I could feel the muscles in my legs processing - breaking down and building back up. I think. Anyway, I also got one of those nasty, toe-curling calf cramps. Pinching the area in between your nose and upper lip really does work. The cramp dissipated pretty quickly and I didn't have to try to massage it out, which sometimes makes it worse.

Oh and I reweighed this morning and got a different number and not in the right direction. For me, it really is better to weigh myself just once a week. At least then it's usually consistent.

Day Six: scale needs calibrating?

Either my scale is wonky, or I have lost 12.5 pounds since I last weighed myself on Sunday. I know if that number is right, it is all water weight, but still I like to think that my cells are releasing their toxins and are flushing out the fat. I need to retake measurements, but I don't think much has changed there.

Day Four: Sore!

I am sore and tired.
I'm still not able to get through all the exercises.
All I've been able to do today is work and work out and eat and now it's time for bath and bed.
I hate being this out of shape. And I forgot to weigh/measure myself this morning.
Where are my post its?

Day Three: In which we winge

I am not a fan of the whole working out 4 times a day. I understand the science/reasoning behind it, but really, I am a busy girl and I like to get it done all at once. I also start my 8k training this week. So, I think I am going to have to break it up into 2 sessions.

Sorry this is a short and boring post, but it's 10:00 and I'm going to bed now, like a good girl. :)

Day Two: Mantras

A lot of people seem to look for motivation to do something they don't want to do. Especially something they need to do, but don't want to put the effort toward it. "Where's my motivation?" they say. And, yes, I too have said that before.

Here's the thing: motivation is not something that finds you while you are sitting on the couch, pondering your existence, your next move, or even what's on television tonight. Motivation is generated by action. One step begets another and so on, until the momentum, the action of working toward achieving your goal becomes your motivation. I am not claiming this as an original idea. Many have said this better and more eloquently than I have. I have been thinking about motivation in starting this project. The reason for my goal is pretty obvious: I want to look and feel better. Therefore it should be easy. I have the goal. I have the tools to get there, so I know what I need to do to achieve my goal. So what's the problem? Excuses. We all make excuses. I don't want to say I'm too tired, I've been working all day, or I just don't feel like it today. I made a choice to act and I am going to see it through.

So what is going to help me just do it when I feel an excuse bubbling up? I am a fan of mantras and writing inspiring words on post-its. So I am writing down the words that will remind me of my goal, my dreams, my desire not to waste my life. I am also repeating to myself little phrases inside my head. Some of my favorites include, keep your eyes on the prize, actions not words, make the choice, and then sometimes I just have to tell my self to stop whining and just do it!

What keeps you going?

Day One

Honestly, I feel like I have wasted most of today. I slept late. I was tired, cranky, and wondering if this is really something I can commit to. I decided that I can do anything for 30 days.
So, measurements taken and prep work done.

I was going to give you some more background and info about me, but I have to go clean up cat puke. So for now, this is all you get. I am almost 33 years old and I have 2 cats. :)